If you're an adoptee reading this, I want to say a few things directly to you, without a story wrapped around them.
You're allowed to love your family and still wonder about the other one. You're allowed to feel nothing about the other one, too — no wondering, no wound, just a fact about your history that doesn't ask anything of you. Neither reaction needs to be fixed or explained.
You're allowed to be angry about things that happened before you could talk, even if no single person did anything wrong. You're allowed to feel nothing resembling anger at all. You're allowed to call your adoption a good thing and also allowed to say it cost you something, in the same conversation, without one canceling the other out.
You don't owe anyone gratitude for existing. You don't owe anyone a tidy narrative where everything worked out and you learned a lesson. Some of it might never resolve into a lesson. It might just stay a set of facts you carry, the way everyone carries facts about how they got here.
And if you ever do search, or decide not to, or search and find something hard, or search and find nothing at all — I don't think any of those outcomes says something is wrong with you. I think it just means you're a person, navigating a situation most people never have to think about, doing it the best way you know how at the time.
That's all. No advice, really. Just permission, in case you needed to hear it from someone who understands the specific shape of not knowing.